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Vol 1 # 3 – Talk right to yourself to be Better Than Good and Improving™
So today I thought I want to expand on the prior post, which concluded with choose for everyday to be a good day. There is a book on my bookshelf that has been there for over 35 years. It is just as vital and important to being Better Than Good and Improving™ as it was the day I bought it. That book is WHAT TO SAY WHEN YOU TALK TO YOUR SELF by Shad Helmstetter, Ph.D. (Pocket Books). Yes my 1982 edition of this book is timeless when you consider what Dr. Helmstetter was proposing.
Helmstetter talks about programming whether that programming comes to children from adults or adults remember it from childhood. Imagine words like “you never were any good at that” or “keep acting that way and you’ll end up in prison”. Imagine how that affects the hearts and minds of youngsters. What is worse, is the stories that we tell ourselves for years and decades that are even more derogatory. I will use myself as an example. When in high school I tried to join the Beta Club, not knowing you had to have the grades first and then were inducted. Foolishly I then rejected myself and never really made good grades.
Roll forward many years and I began my doctoral journey. Because I knew I would fail for any course with a grade below a B I buckled down. I fretted constantly and drove my dear wife crazy. At the end of the first course I had an A. Suddenly my attitude about my ability to make As changed. I kept the petal to the medal and am more than a little proud to say that I had a perfect 4.0 for my doctorate, all As. Now all of that and a dollar will buy you a bad cup of coffee at McDonalds. Meaning, I don’t take myself too seriously and that fact doesn’t make me any more special than you. It does mean that our attitudes about ourselves helps determine whether or not we are Better Than Good and Improving™.
So, my friends, get yourself a copy of Dr. Helmstetter’s book. Make what you say to yourself positive and uplifting. That will also put you in a better frame of mind and will allow you to uplift others. Just like the best way to learn a subject is to teach it, the best way to be uplifted is to be uplifting. So, say positive things to yourself all day, everyday.